Lame Limericks (not for lovers of poetry)

[mondine]

My hope is that this will be an ongoing thread, dedicated to particularly-poor examples of the form.
Such as:

There once was a fellow from Sweden
Who could talk 'till your ears started bleedin'
I'd say "Well now, Eric
That is esoteric
And more detail than I was quite needin'."

[IamTheKing9]

That is pretty good! Erik will surely like the "knowing hidden and deep knowledge" part.

[Aírmanareiks Þiudareiks]

I can see my name in even the topic header... "Lame Limerick"...

[mondine]

Originally Posted by Eiríkr Rauði

I can see my name in even the topic header... "Lame Limerick"...

I'm hoping for an entry from you. The better to popularize the 'revenge limerick' to its due status as noble art.

[Aírmanareiks Þiudareiks]

Here's a lame one, following the a-a-b-b-a scheme:
There was a dog who was lost and found;
Between that, he lived in a pound,
He could not be fed,
So I cut his four peds,
And buried him in a mound...
Yup, pretty lame. And here, by peds I mean feet.

[Aírmanareiks Þiudareiks]

Fond of florents always was Laurent,
So much that they melted past the current,
"Santo subito!" as he shouted,
Knowledge of French, the dead Pope touted,
Yet, forgetful was Laurent in seeding his torrents
And here's a "revenge limerick" lol...
"I always flaunted,
while he taunted;
It was a shame,
that Mondine, his name,
was what kept me daunted"
Anyways, I'm J/K, and in the limerick, I'm referring to the pronunciation of your name, nothing else. And even in that case, I'm joking.

[mondine]

Bravo, Eric! Wonderfully and delightfully bad!
Anyone else?

[IamTheKing9]

Umm... I've just thought of one -

There was once a goon,
Who lived on the moon,
He threw up a ball,
And it became really tall ( ),
And said, "It won't come down anytime soon!"

It ispretty lame, yeah. But then, this is the first I've ever written. I'm sure I'll be able to make even lamer ones ( ). And Erik, you should be compared to Edward Lear! You're writing very good limericks. Though yeah, think twice about double-posting again ( ).

[mondine]

Admirably bad. But if you apply yourself, you should be able to manage worse.

[IamTheKing9]

Originally Posted by mondine

Admirably bad. But if you apply yourself, you should be able to manage worse.

Thank you very much!!!