Should parents control their children’s beliefs?

[Karin Brix]

P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"SPAN lang=EN-GBMr and Mrs Normal are going about their life with their political and religious beliefs being right down the middle. One day they discoverer that their child, who is under 15 is becoming very extreme in its beliefs.(political or religious)Do they have the right to somehow stop that child or should they leave that child to potently become one we read about in the news?[/color]P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"SPAN lang=EN-GBThis question is about how much we should respect the individual right to have our own opinion about anything. SPAN lang=EN-GB style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-fareast-language: SV; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA"I am talking about the EXTREME, not the so-called normal beliefs [/color][/color]P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"SPAN lang=EN-GBSPAN lang=EN-GB style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-fareast-language: SV; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA"[/color]What do you think??xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comfficeffice" /o/o[/color]

[mondine]

May I be the first to point out that beliefs cannot be controlled?
By parents, or anyone else.

And the dynamic is age-old. Trying to enforce the beliefs of the parents in the mind of the child has almost always had the opposite result.
All a parent can do is provide good information and good guidance, pay attention to what the child is doing, and do what they can to prevent acting out in negative behaviour.

And if an extreme situation is suddenly discovered 'one day', they should have as intent a look at their parenting skills, as they do at the child's behaviour.

[IamTheKing9]

I agree with mondine on this (as on so many other matters). I parents suddenly find ("one day") that their children are becoming extremists or whatever, its basically they who are to blame. As parents, its their duty to keep a hold on their children, and stop them from doing what they're doing (if they're doing anything wrong). But no parents can control their children's views. The child does what he or she thinks is right (or wrong, which happens when the child is a bully ). They should bring the child up in a good way, and stopm him or her from doing anything bad.

[warzabidul]

Anyone is entitled to their beliefs and opinion as long as it is informed after extensive research on both sides the argument. It is not enough to have a belief. You must be able to defend your point of view or argument to a group of people.

If you are unable to defend your beliefs or point of view without getting into a shouting match with another person then you had better keep your beliefs to yourself until you find an acceptable means of communicating those ideas.

Parents are responsible for what their children view and read until they are more mature. Who your parents are will affect whether you will have values that are correct towards the people around you.

In England one of the things that aggravates me is the idea of multiculturalism as opposed to internationalism. Multicultiralism as it is seen in England is one where you have communities based on the part of London you're living in for example. If you live in the Brent region you're far more likely to be of one nationality than another and this is fine. What is more of a problem though, is when you are out socially and you notice national and racial segregation and I'm not speaking of government enforced segregation. I'm speaking about ideological and religious segregation of people. Whilst in Geneva you go into a Shisha place and are surrounded by people from four or five continents if you go to a bar in England or a fast food you will find people only of one or two nationalities.

Coming to England from Switzerland is a challenge for a European, getting used to the culture and the behaviour at once. If you come to a country assimilate into the culture you're surrounded by, learn about their culture and once you have learned their culture then allow them to see your culture. If you don't do this then tensions will arise between members of a European country. It becomes worse when different nationalities and continents become part of the equation.

We've seen the tensions in England, France and America. Why did they occur? Because there is a culture of segregation, some from government, others from the lack of understanding that multicultural societies are not what should be boasted about. What should be boasted about is the way in which they interact.

At the opposite side of Lake Geneva to where Geneva is there was a mutlicultural meeting of song and dance from various countries. It was an attempt to show the cultural diversity of the children's nations whilst at the same time encouraging dialogue.

Who is responsible for this? Firstly the parents, because when your child integrates a society life is easier and secondly the community leaders, who are attempting to show that what you hear on the news is not always the correct image.

So should parents control their children's beliefs? Not if the parents are discouraging their children from assimilating the culture they are surrounded by.

[Oscar]

I'm not agree with parents who try to control their children's beliefs. I think it's not the form in which you can create a good citizen. Each one needs to have his own beliefs independently of the culture is surrounded by. brbrWhen you're a kid it's necessary that your parents try to give you a good education and a way to live your life, but, when you are growing up, you need to question and to proof that ideas. It's not only about believing what others tell you, but about having an open mind to accept that other people can have a different point of view and you don't have convince them they're incorrect.brbrI strongly believe everybody can (and need to) have a different point of view according to personal experiences and the culture is surrounded by.brbrSo, let's go respecting the opinions of each one because all they are important. Everybody lives according to their beliefs and that's ok for me. brbrNobody has the "absolut truth"

[GroundPounderUSMC]

Originally Posted by mondine

May I be the first to point out that beliefs cannot be controlled?
By parents, or anyone else.

And the dynamic is age-old. Trying to enforce the beliefs of the parents in the mind of the child has almost always had the opposite result.
All a parent can do is provide good information and good guidance, pay attention to what the child is doing, and do what they can to prevent acting out in negative behaviour.

And if an extreme situation is suddenly discovered 'one day', they should have as intent a look at their parenting skills, as they do at the child's behaviour.

Kind of goes along with that whole "preacher's daughter theory" ey?

[andrew247]

I think parents should let their children think what they want. However, controlling what a teenager thinks and does, is not really in the hands of the parents, since they pretty much do what they want.

[Karin Brix]

It seems like everybody thinks parents should respect their children’s right to have their own religious and political beliefs, I am all for that, but, and there is always a but, it is also my duty as a parent to stop my child if it gets out of hand! A parent can teach the child tolerance and peace, give the child every kind of information about the world, and we all know children, especially teenagers, will go out and get ideas from friends and different kind of sources. Does a parent not have a duty to stop a child becoming extreme Nazi or putting a bomb together? Just how far does the respect for the child’s individual right goes??

[mondine]

Well it's a matter of practicality that you cannot control thought.
It's not a matter of the child having the right to their own beliefs, so much as the inability to force a change in this.

All you can control (hopefully) is the environment. I'd definitely forbid my child from, say, going to Klan meetings, or neo-nazi rallies;
and would expect to be involved enough in family life that I'd notice a garage full of pipebomb-making materials.

But again, the work of parenting starts long before this point is reached. At this point, all you can control is behaviour.
You can influence belief, all through the life of the child, by communicating openly and logically about ethics, morals, and humanity.
But the ideas must stand on their own logical validity. "Because I say so" just isn't going to do it.

[cruocitae]

Quite impossible poll.. :/ Once I wanted some punk-alike hairstyle, you know, that tower in yhe middle of your head :P, no colours, just hairgel and that's all. What did my mom do? Stop me. I felt really wrong.. :/ She said: "Professors will discriminate you".. I said that others have such hair too, and no problem with them.. And assuming that I've one of the best (in learning) in the class, I don't really have chances of discrimination. Oh, I think I can explain why is my mom so... she's a kindergarten teacher, damnit!