What a big deal

chinacorner · 05-22-2006, 02:22 AM

A young businessman had just started his business, and rented a beautiful office. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear busy, the businessman picked up the phone and pretended that he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments.
PP　　Finally, he hung up and asked the visitor. "Can I help you?" The man said, "Sure. I've come to install the phone."PP

chinacorner · 05-22-2006, 02:23 AM

One hundred percent

　　Patient: Doctor, please tell me the truth. What are my chances of recovery?

　　Doctor: Just one hundred percent! Statistics show that only nine out of ten die of the disease. Now nine of my patients have already died of it. You are the tenth!

chinacorner · 05-22-2006, 02:24 AM

The Biggest in the World

　　Peter dozed off while his teacher was talking.

　　Teacher: Peter! Tell us, what's the biggest in the world?

　　Peter: Well, well.... eyelids....

　　Teacher: What? Eyelids?

　　Peter: Yes, sir. Because as soon as I shut my eyes, the eyelids cover everything of the world.

chinacorner · 05-22-2006, 02:24 AM

The Korean War Is Over

　　My husband's brother-in-law, Joseph, an American real estate agent, came to China for a short visit to our city. To show hospitality at the welcoming dinner party, Mr.Sun, the host, entertained Joseph with Chinese wine, saying,

　　"According to our custom, a brother-in-law coming to his wife's native country for the first time must drink three cups of wine."Joseph declined the offer by saying,"Thank you, but I can't drink even one drop."

　　"Then our dinner won't be over without your drinking at least one cup," insisted Mr. Sun. To this, Joseph responded, "The Korean War is over. Don't attack the Americans any more."

chinacorner · 05-22-2006, 02:26 AM

Chief is at the wedding

　　A police stopped a motorist who was speeding on the street. "But officer," the man said, "I can explain."

　　"Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to put you in jail until the chief gets back."

　　"But ,officer, I …."

　　"I said to keep quiet! You are going to jail!"

　　A few hours later, the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "You are lucky because the chief is at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."

　　"Are you sure?" answered the man in the cell. "I'm the groom."

chinacorner · 05-22-2006, 02:27 AM

An opponent lost his head

　　While making a long, dull speech, a politician received a great deal of heckling from the gallery. Secondly, someone threw a cabbage onto the stage. "Ladies and gentlemen," said the politician , "I see that one of my opponents has lost his head."

05-22-2006, 02:22 AM	#1 (permalink)
chinacorner Googler Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 61 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	What a big deal A young businessman had just started his business, and rented a beautiful office. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear busy, the businessman picked up the phone and pretended that he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments. PP　　Finally, he hung up and asked the visitor. "Can I help you?" The man said, "Sure. I've come to install the phone."PP

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05-22-2006, 02:23 AM	#2 (permalink)
chinacorner Googler Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 61 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	One hundred percent 　　Patient: Doctor, please tell me the truth. What are my chances of recovery? 　　Doctor: Just one hundred percent! Statistics show that only nine out of ten die of the disease. Now nine of my patients have already died of it. You are the tenth!

05-22-2006, 02:24 AM	#3 (permalink)
chinacorner Googler Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 61 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	The Biggest in the World 　　Peter dozed off while his teacher was talking. 　　Teacher: Peter! Tell us, what's the biggest in the world? 　　Peter: Well, well.... eyelids.... 　　Teacher: What? Eyelids? 　　Peter: Yes, sir. Because as soon as I shut my eyes, the eyelids cover everything of the world.

05-22-2006, 02:24 AM	#4 (permalink)
chinacorner Googler Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 61 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	The Korean War Is Over 　　My husband's brother-in-law, Joseph, an American real estate agent, came to China for a short visit to our city. To show hospitality at the welcoming dinner party, Mr.Sun, the host, entertained Joseph with Chinese wine, saying, 　　"According to our custom, a brother-in-law coming to his wife's native country for the first time must drink three cups of wine."Joseph declined the offer by saying,"Thank you, but I can't drink even one drop." 　　"Then our dinner won't be over without your drinking at least one cup," insisted Mr. Sun. To this, Joseph responded, "The Korean War is over. Don't attack the Americans any more."

05-22-2006, 02:26 AM	#5 (permalink)
chinacorner Googler Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 61 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Chief is at the wedding 　　A police stopped a motorist who was speeding on the street. "But officer," the man said, "I can explain." 　　"Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to put you in jail until the chief gets back." 　　"But ,officer, I …." 　　"I said to keep quiet! You are going to jail!" 　　A few hours later, the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "You are lucky because the chief is at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back." 　　"Are you sure?" answered the man in the cell. "I'm the groom."

05-22-2006, 02:27 AM	#6 (permalink)
chinacorner Googler Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 61 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	An opponent lost his head 　　While making a long, dull speech, a politician received a great deal of heckling from the gallery. Secondly, someone threw a cabbage onto the stage. "Ladies and gentlemen," said the politician , "I see that one of my opponents has lost his head."

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