Trying to stay cool

[stuckinfl]

I had a terrible rage session last night. I live on the top floor if a commercial building and it gets real hot in here. I even installed a new window unit on my dollar. Part of the problem is I turned off the AC during the day while I was at work, and it just wouldn't cool off. I finally lost it and started punching my fridge. I threw things at it, even took a chair and hit the fridge with it. I'll probably lose my deposit for that. I guess the heat here in Florida brings up a lot of anger issues with me. I feel very stuck here in florida, hence my screen name, yet there's nothing holding me here, no kids or anything. I don't even have a career. I'm a clerk at a pawn shop. All I see day after day, are poor blacks coming in telling me how there are no jobs out there. So naturally I'm holding on to this job with everything I've got. I'm the youngest in the family (35) and everybody seems so cemented here. I want to forge my own path. I feel like packing up my car and going to california, I have a cousin out there. But then I hear on the news how california is bankrupt or something. I thought this little apartment would be a place where I could finish up college. I don't have the energy or money for another move. I mean if I do, it's out of this state next time. My mom says, "hold out a couple months, it will cool off again". Are they in some denial or something? The weather is bearable for less than half the year here. And it's not just the weather here but the people too. I mean if it's not poor blacks or white trash, it's retired old billygoats from the mid-west. And there's a major cigarette culture here too, forget about going out to a nightclub if you want to breathe. Everytime I come to an intersection there's a white trash hand out the window with a cigarette. I'm happy at least they raised taxes on cigarettes.

Well, it's sunset and my ac just clicked off at 79. Last night it ran till 3 in the morning non stop, I couldn't even sleep I was so hot (and mad). I went to work on 4 hours of sleep helping these lowlifes. Lesson learned, keep the ac running during the day.